I was looking so forward to working as a volunteer at Zumbro but my job has me in New Orleans... Bummer!
Not sure why I watch the Olympics. I have been getting into Curling, then the United States blew it...
And then the scale! I did it! I stepped on the scale. I have not stepped on that scale for 5 weeks. I have been working out often and felling better. Yesterday I did 2 hours and 15 minutes of biking and light weights on top of biking. I am logging 120-150 minutes a day of aerobic exercise with a heart rate between 100-120. two days a week i work out before work, five days a week I have been doing 45 minutes at lunch, average of 4 nights a week i get an hour in. Been tracking the food intake on three programs and that all show I should have a nice calorie deficit. I was thinking I was doing so well. I was looking forward to a good number. Well, I gained 5 pounds. YEP, 269 pounds! 57 pounds more than when I finished the Superior 50 mile and 39 pounds more than when I went at 77 miles in the ST 100. F*#% is all I could say.
Crushing... I just can not help it but to once again being fat is just hard to accept as I am working so hard!!! It brought back memories...
We all have stories of our lives that we hold deep inside, especially those of us who were fat children then lost weight and became fat as adults, then lost weight and became fat again. But as a child, I clearly recall the shame that only fat children really know and understand. I have been there. In the 7th grade I weighed 21 pounds less than I do now weighing in at a good solid 248 pounds. I am three inches taller now...
Being fat taught at an early age that often fat people were unacceptable by societal standards, it wasn't a hard lesson to learn. Fortunately, I do not get the same impression as an adult, but still have those scars of when I was the 7th grader nicknamed "porky". There was no place to escape the ridicule and shame, except food... as family, school and doctors all provided pressure about the "problem". I have that same sensation now as a adult struggling with the weight.
I use the term "Fat" now only used as a descriptor, but there were other names besides porky when i was a child that still stick... chunky monkey, husky, butter balls, etc, etc. Bottom line, some people are fat and struggle so much to overcome the phobia. I have come to learn there is nothing wrong with the term "fat" and use it in this post. But what does a this have to do with this blog?
The goal of this blog has always been simple...to share and to learn. Everyone has had a different set of life experiences...some great and some horrific. How life goes, how to train, how to eat, how to overcome injury. I have though I may change the blog to a daily weight, exercise and calorie diary but that is so boring... Not sure what I will do? Weight myself daily? I know I need to re-evaluate my food intake. Do I do as people say you never should, that being go less that 1,200 calories. According to the programs, I have averaged about 1,900 calories a day over the past 5 weeks with an average calories burned during exercise of 1,100. Just makes no sense! No sense at all? The numbers say one thing, the body says another?
On the health front, I have had breathing issues extending back to the 2008 Psycho-Wyco. I feel great when I work out but shortly after and throughout the day I can not breath and I cough and hack all day long, unless I am working out. Earlier this week, I could not stop coughing for at least 10 minutes and struggled to breath to the point of tears...
Throughout the past two years, it was more of a come and go issue, but now it is difficult not to hack every 15 minutes all day long. In to years, I have had 4 visits to the Doc about this, two chest x-rays, two rounds of antibiotics, two types of inhalers, nebulizor and yet it just hangs on! This past month, my coughing is now to the point that I feel my head bulge and pain comes out my eyes when I have a real hard coughing episode. So with the weight gain when I am monitoring my food intake so close, I contacted my physician and we discussed this long term issue. As the result of our discussion, I am going to take a few days off from working out and head to the Doc for a series of test Friday.
In that time, I am going t0 decide where I will go with the blog. I no longer have the goal to run again and I no longer have a goal to race again. My first goal this year was to deal once again with this weight issue and then see where it takes me. My goal had been 230 pounds 65 days from now. To do that, I need to lose one pound every 1.66 days (3.87 pounds per week) to make that goal. I do not think that is possible or healthy so I will have the blood drawn, I think I will seek a hormone test as well. No doubt there is something F%#$ed up... I just am out of questions in seeking answers. Any of you have any ideas?
10 comments:
Londell, my heart goes out to you. I am so sorry and can feel your frustration and sadness through your words. Don't blame yourself; something is going on and I'm so glad that you are taking some time to figure it out. My gut tells me that you aren't getting enough calories over what you are exercising off so maybe your metabolism is shutting down- just my uneducated take on it. My prayers are with you and I hope you get rid of that cough and feel better soon.
This is a rough time for you. I can imagine your frustration given all you have been doing. Remember that it's still worth it to feel that boost from physical effort even if you are not dropping pounds. Though I know that's not very helpful right now. Definitely worth getting some tests done to know if there is something else going on. Don't give up. Try to keep focused on the emotional and mental benefits of working out even when the physical results are not evident.
Write when you feel like it. We'll be here to read it.
Helen
Sorry to hear about your struggles, but I'm glad that you're seeing your Doc again to get things figured out.
Sounds to me like you aren't eating enough and your metabolism is shutting down as Beth suggested. There is a calculator that you can use to figure out an estimate of intake at http://www.freedieting.com/tools/calorie_calculator.htm
Go with "fat loss" not "extreme fat loss" if you expect to lose weight and keep it off. The "zig zag" method is also more effective for most people.
Beyond the number of calories you're consuming is the quality of food. You can't out train a crappy diet, and you need proper nutrition while still controlling caloric intake. Getting the right combo of carbs, protein, and fats at every meal can make a difference in how your body responds to food (blood sugar level, insulin response, lipid response, etc).
Not sure what your max heart rate is, but an exercise heart rate of 100-120 sounds pretty low. Higher intensity interval training will be more effective than steady state aerobic training for fat loss, but get the "breathing thing" figured out with your Doc before starting intervals.
Lifting light weights will not accomplish much on the weight loss front either, though it is necessary to start with lighter weights to strengthen connective tissues before going to heavier lifts to avoid injury. Lifting weights in the intensity zone of 8-12 reps with short rest periods (60 sec) seems to produce the most effective hormone response to help with fat loss.
With higher intensity exercise, you shouldn't need to spend 2-3 hours working out every day either since your metabolism will be revved up long after the exercise session has ended.
Hang in there Londell! Run when it's fun, do something else when it isn't. We're all here for you :)
Okay, take a deep breath. It's not the end of the world. You were saying not long ago that you felt good and now you've let a number ruin that. Screw the number. You were saying at one time that you thought your clothes might be a bit looser; could it be that you've gained a little muscle mass through the inclined treadmill and weights?
Hang in there. We're all pulling for you.
Londell I know you can do it. We can all surmise the root cause of your issue, but if you feel you are 100% stumped on this one, get a professional opinion. Something else could be going on that no one but actual medical docs and dieticians can help you with. You obviously have determination and postive attitude in your corner so, like Quick said, don't let a number on the scale be the final judge. Like you say...carry on.
Londell - the folks above me have given some great advice. See the doc and make sure that they don't find anything. I know how frustrating it can be, cut yourself some slack and keep working out as it is good for the mind regardless of the impact on the weight. You will find the solution so keep pressing on until you do. Best of luck.
Londell, stay persistent and don't worry about the scale. My advice would be to rely on measurements rather than a scale. One's weight can fluctuate due to water gain/loss as well as muscle gain. Another suggestion would be to cut way back on the high glycemic load foods such as bread, potatoes, and pasta. They will spike your insulin system and put your body into fat storage mode. Stick to meats, fruits, veg, and nuts and you'll see the pounds come off.
Also, take doctors' and dietitian's advice with a grain of salt. Most doctor's are too apt to throw medication at problems rather than find the root cause, and dietitians too often just worry about caloric intake. If these folks are cutting the mustard for you, seek some other advice. And last of all, keep expressing your feelings. It's a healthy and normal thing to do. We're all here in support of you. Now carry on! :)
Good grief, did I really misspell "dietician" that many times? Oy vey!! Note to self, no posting when tired and sleepy.........
Thanks for all the comments! Your thoughts and kindness have a positive impact!
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