I was thrilled to read about a few successes in the recent ultra races… Several people, I can only be amazed at their accomplishments. John Taylor 59 hours 11 minutes at Arrowhead 135 - he amazed me... I know what it is like to be at the back of the pack and find the courage to keep going... Inspiring! HOPE HE GIVES A REPORT? Karen is overly modest about her successes (27:45:02 in the Rocky Racoon 100, whereas Wayne Nelson did 12:16:58 in the 50 mile and then went back to support Karen). However, they are all part of hard work as it does not come easily.
I still need to step on the scale. I don't know when I will. I am more focused on the workouts and monitoring the diet. I am now up to 45-60 minutes on the bike at lunch, 60 minutes on the elliptical at least four days a week, and three days of a weight-lifting routine. I feel stronger, but the clothes fit much differently. I did get a hug and was told I was "less round." I am unsure if that was a compliment, but I took it that way. I will keep plugging along and think that I am more comfortable each week, extending my workouts by 5-10%, and I will let the rest fall wherever possible.
The thing most interested me was I got a phone call from an old friend whom I hadn't seen for a very long time. She left a voice message at my work as I changed my cell phone a few years back and she no longer had my new number, but knew where i worked. I called her back, and she spoke about her recently getting engaged (She was in a long-term relationship when we met in 2006, and I convinced her to consider other options as she was notably unhappy - she met her fiance in 2008 and said she is so happy), of her successful employment opportunities and of her continued desire to become a parent. As we spoke, I sensed sadness in all of this happiness.
She began to speak of how her father's health was hospitalized just after Christmas. He had been fighting lung cancer (Mesothelioma). He was a contractor and had demolished several asbestos-filled structures before a known danger existed. She was angry that her dad did not show a will to fight for life this time when he was in the hospital, and she got upset and said things she now regrets. She left the hospital room to cool off when her father turned and passed on… Telling me this, she was crying.
She expressed her sadness about two things: what she said and the fact that he was no longer willing to fight for his life. This caused me to be at a loss for words… Those who know me know I usually have an opinion or something to say about anything, but this made me think.
Being older than she and already having my child grow (soon to be 21), I tried to think about what if I was in his shoes… I proceeded to tell her that one of the most difficult times in the lives of many parents is seeing how great their children have grown into good adults and how we may not be able to continue in their lives. I explained that one of the most frustrating yet rewarding things I have ever done was parenting…
I continued to ask her if her father was a really wise man. She said he was the most intelligent and caring man she knew. I then asked her if he was running a 100-mile race. Would he know when it was over? And if he wanted to quit, may she say some things to fire him up and get him to finish? Some may not be the most flattering.
She said that he was well-tuned to his physical well-being and ability. Then I asked her why she questioned his decision not to fight cancer any longer, as he knew what she could not see or understand… I tell her I hear this often about people who are the greatest fighter of a disease, there comes a point when they just know, and come to peace with all they have done. And he knows that his decision would make many who loved him mad, so I would bet the words she left him with were not harmful but understood… As he was a wise man…
I asked her to look in the mirror and smile. Her father was watching, and she needed to be happy about her pending marriage and parenthood. It will be a wonderful ride, and she will have him and his memories as one of the best guides. She should not be sad but happy that she had a caring father who knew what was best as a parent and a human. I could sense her smile.
She asked about my life, and I told her I had to go, as there was not much to tell… She asked for my address and hoped we could get together soon… We hung up… I assume I will get a wedding invitation soon, but I'm not sure when we will talk again. I'm not sure what it is about not keeping in touch with friends in this highly electronic world, but just like her father, I guess we wish we did something when we can no longer do it.
Carry on…
2 comments:
Difficult enough to lose a parent but under those circumstances very hard to deal with. I expect your conversation helped your friend immensely. The fact that she called you in the first place says a lot - and I am sure she was very glad she did.
Great progress on the workouts!
I'm glad you were there for your old friend. Obviously she know that you were an ear that she could depend on. Great job with the workouts and yes, I would take less round as a compliment. :)
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