What used to be...

I read this and thought about many relationships I have had over the years and how I hear so many people say that they no longer love their mate because the mate has changed so much... We all have changed over time. Like my doctor tells me, I am getting so old that I should not buy green bananas (joking). So, I wanted to share this story from the pastor of a Church service I attended Sunday. It was about people changing, and our love can waver with change...

They have been married for two years. He loves literature and often posts his work online, but people need to read it. He is also into photography, and he handled their wedding photos. He loves her very much.

Likewise with her. She has a quick temper and constantly bullies him.

He is a gentleman and always gives in to her. Today, she's being "willful" again.

Her: "Why can't you be my friend's wedding photographer? She promised she'd pay."

Him: "I don't have time that day."

Her: "Humph!"

Him: "Huh?"

Her: "Don't have time? Write less of those novels, and you will have all the necessary time."

Him: "I... someone will definitely recognize my work someday."

Her: "Humph! I don't care; you'll have to do it for her.

Him: "No."

Her: "Just this once?"

Him: "No."

Negotiation's broken. So, she gave the final warning: "Give me a Yes within three days, or else..."

First day.

She "withheld" the kitchen, bathroom, computer, refrigerator, television, and hi-fi—except the double bed—to show her "benevolence." Of course, she had to sleep on it, too. He didn't mind, as he still had some cash in his pockets.

Second day.

She conducted a raid, removed everything from his pockets, and warned, "Seek any external help, and you bear the consequences." He's nervous now. Night. On the bed. He begs for mercy, hoping that she'll end this state. She doesn't give a damn. No way am I giving in, whatever he says. Until he agrees.

Third day Night. On the Bed. He's lying on the bed, looking to one side. She's lying on the bed, looking to the other side.

Him: "We need to talk."

Her: "Unless it's about the wedding, forget it."

Him: "It's something very important."

She remains silent.

Him: "Let's get a divorce."

She did not believe her ears.

Him: "I got to know a girl."

She's furious and wants to hit him.

But she held it down, wanting to let him finish. But her eyes already felt wet.

He took a photo out from his chest.

Probably from his undershirt pocket; that's the only place she didn't go through yesterday. How careless.

Him: "She's a nice girl."

Her tears fell.

Him: "She has a good personality too."

She's heartbroken because he puts a photo of another girl "close to his heart."

Him: "She says she'll support me fully in pursuing literature after we get married."

She's very jealous because she said the same thing in the past.

Him: "She loves me truly."

She wishes to sit up and scream at him: "Don't I?"

Him: "So, I think she won't force me to do something I don't want to do."

She's thinking, but the rage won't subside.

Him: "Want to look at the photo I took for her?"

Her: ".....!"

He brings the photo before her eyes.

She's in total rage, hits his hand away, and leaves a burning mark of a slap on his face.

He sighs.

She cries.

He puts the photo back in his pocket.

She pulls her hand back under the blanket.

He turns off the light and sleeps.

She turns on the light and sits up.

He's asleep.

She lost sleep.

She regrets treating him the way she treated him.

She cried again and thought about a lot of things.

She wants to wake him up.

She wants to have an intimate talk with him.

She doesn't want to push him anymore.

She stares at his chest. She wants to see how the girl looks.

She slips the photo out. She wanted to cry, and she wanted to laugh.

It's a beautiful photo of her. A photo he took for her when they met.

She bent down and kissed him on his cheek.

He smiled. He was just pretending to be asleep.

This makes me think back to how I have changed, as have many friends and other people I have known over the years. Many of you know my ex-wife, and she is a fabulous human being. We once loved being with each other. We do change. Amazing how I clearly recall the love, the hate, and then the acceptance... While the parting is always hard, she is truly happy. Although, there may be more change. I know many, including myself, who have been on the high and low roller coaster ride of giving and feeling loved. As i age, I desire that flat ride on the old model T with the rail to guide me... You know, like at the amusement park. But then again, I would have missed out on so much pleasure and pain. Memories...

I think I am going to spend this week thinking about all the quality activities and smiles so many people have shared with me. Those memories will never be taken away. Who knows, it might make me smile a whole lot more, and if I really look at my life, I have so much to smile for.

Carry on, my friends. Carry on...