Damb IT!

I know I should watch my language on the public forum, although I am frustrated, exasperated, enraged, maddened, aggravated, bothered, perturbed, discouraged, annoyed, irritated, agitated, etc…  I am starting my third Prednisone and Leviquin regimen in 5 months. 

I hate these two drugs as they make my body feel like all my body fluids have been left at the last aid station.   Prednisone I nickname “pregnant zone” as I gain weight like I am pregnant and not a thing I can do about it! I try hard to balance these issues but getting out of bed hurts as that damb Leviquin makes me feel worse than when I ran 77 miles of the Superior Hiking Trail.  Well on a positive note, I do not have the blisters, just the body pain.

I have not even went into the “Why me” phase of this now 5 year on again off again battle.  I often say “Why not me?” as I have insurance, a good job, I am 51 and my child is nearly 100% independent.  I have the time and the energy (well not really the energy anymore) to go through the fight.  I also have other dear friends who are far less fortunate than I.  Just today I read the CaringBridge post of a dear friend who does not even have the option I have and she will not see her youngest graduate from high school.  So I am from thinking why me, I often look at me and think, why them?

All in all this will be my 11^th Prednisone round and 4^th Leviquin round since 2009, that is beyond the IV push when I had surgery.  If this does not work, it will be surgery again.  This time exploratory as blood counts are OK, just have the constant recurring infection, which will not allow me to sleep unless I sit up, messes with my vision and gives me a headache with a much high pain level than I have ever felt in my life.  My chest is so congested and my wheezing is terrible.  Not sure how people are putting up with me?  I try to be happy and pleasing, but I am really getting worn!

Been taking pictures a few weeks ago.  It was at the Ice Cave on the north facing shore of Lake Superior.  I find pictures help take the mind of other things.  Here are a few pictures:

Music sure helps sooth the soul.  I find my music taste is much more varied now.   Many new favorites I think most of you have never heard.  My son exposed me to Amos Lee and Rodrigo y Gabriela.  I listen to Bella Ruse, Robert Earl Keen, Danny Gatton, RyCooder, Steel Magnolia, Marcia Ball, Mallary Hope, and so many others.  Also still love the local scene with Mick Sterling, Pamela McNeil and of course the recent Home Free boys. 

I have come to have a new appreciation of how music is really a great medicine for the soul.  It can make us laugh, cry, run faster, smile… It is just like the things we eat, something’s make me feel better, others worse.  Music is like food in many ways.

I know that I have traveled many roads.  I often wonder “if I”, would I have the issues I face today.  The human body is a strange and hard to understand bunch of living organisms that promote each other and feed on each other.  I will never understand.  I just wonder if this next round of medicine fails, should I just give up and see what the body can do for me.  I am tired…

I always loved a quote from Julius Caesar:

“If a man was to know the end of this days business there it come, Would it suffice us that this day will end and the end be known.  If we meet again, well then we will smile and if not, then this parting was well made.” 

While I have long hoped to be back on the trails with many of you, my trail friends, I am not sure I will get there again.  No regrets as I am glad I was part of the journey.  I will hope to join you again but as of now I am losing hope.  I am not a quitter, but this is really making my patience run thin!

Carry on my friends…

Dear Old Man Winter:

Please consider this letter a notice of your termination, effective immediately. While you are exceeding your clear expectations and requirements, these January temperatures of  -20° F (wind chill lower than -40° F), constant snow and blustery conditions show you have exceeded all expectations.  You deserve a better position elsewhere.  I know I have no control in the hiring and firing of Mother Nature’s staff, but often wish I had some influence. 

Why do I want to rid myself of this long winter?  I miss riding my bike to work! 

Many people say "get a fat bike fat man".  This would be an option if the roads were not so packed with snow and drivers having a high level of frustration, it is clearly dangerous to even attempt to ride to work.  More than half my commute is sharing roads where the speed limit exceeds 40 MPH.

People often ask what the allure of commuting on a bicycle.  To me there are so many reasons, many basic which include:

• It is cheaper than driving. Due to rising fuel costs and upkeep, the average cost of owning a car in 2013 increased just over $9,000, according to AAA. They say costs just $308 per year to keep bikes in shape––nearly 30 times less than cars.  This is not a fair comparison as I still own the car, but I save about $4.00 a day in fuel costs along when I bike. According to the Commute Saving Calculator, the cost for my actual commute is $5,702.40 annually.  So with 260 workdays, I generally commute 60-80 of those I save about $1,500 a year.  Although I do have $200 of repairs annually.  But who would not accept an average tax free $100 a month?

• It's a free gym on wheels.

• Bike commuting can be a very effective cardiovascular exercise as I age.  It is easier on the joints, especially when being overweight ... so something like swimming or biking that's not pounding on the joints can be a good thing. 

• I miss traffic jams. Generally, it is a 20-25 minute car drive under the best of circumstances.  In reality, I need to plan 40-45 minutes for a margin of error.  There have been many times people who have the same commute take longer to drive than my ride. 

• I believe I save significantly on health care expenses. 

• My productivity increase notably with a bicycle ride to work.  Several studies found people who commute to work by bike, walking or jogging were less likely to call in sick.  I know I am healthier in the summer, when I ride often.  There are studies that show you're more likely to get sick taking the bus. Fresh air does a body good. A study by the University of Nottingham found publictransit riders were "six times more likely to suffer from acuterespiratory infections".

• I never have to worry about a parking spot.  In fact, we have covered bike parking right next to the workout room and locker facility. (This is an amenity that to me, is worth making 20% less than many of my colleagues who do not have this option.)  Money is not everything...

• The most important reason to me is life.  When I bike to work, I have little issues (provided the roads are not filled with ice and snow).  I stop at the stoplight and if another biker arrives, I strike up a conversation and we ride a few miles together, if we are heading the same way. Try that in a car.  When I am biking, if I see kids playing, see nature’s wonders or meet up with friends, I can easily stop and enjoy the moments.  

SUMMARY - When I am able to ride hassle free, spending zero on gas, exercising more, becoming more eco-friendly, not constantly looking for my car keys, becoming a leader in the work place, unworried about available parking, avoiding stop and go traffic, and saving money on your insurance, you are going to see a HUGE boost in your overall mood and self esteem.  Sure, my bike commute is typically twice as long as my drive, I actually save time.

When I drive my car, a typical day may be up at 5:45 AM.  Waste 15 minutes just getting up.  I will make a small breakfast as I lackadaisically meander throughout the house.  At about 6:50, I will shower and get set for work.  By 7:20 I am in the car and after some frustration with traffic, can walk into the office at 7:50 AM, on a good day. 

If I bike, I have the bike ready to go with everything I need packed (including breakfast) the night before.  I awake at 5:45 AM and throw on bike gear and by 5:55 AM I am riding.  The crisp air is wonderful!  I arrive at work at 6:50 to 7:10 AM.  I do a 10-minute stretching routine I shower and get prepared for the day.  At 7:40 AM I walk into the office with my breakfast and eat at my desk while I start my day.

So in reality, I have more than 10 minutes of saved time with the 18-mile bike commute, I feel better and less stressed.  As I had the chance to chat with acquaintances who were on the road and enjoy some great scenery along the way, my spirit is higher than normal.  Scenery and wonders you just can’t see with the noise of the car and moving at 55 MPH or more are experienced.

So Old Man Winter, please ease up and make the roads bicycle safe, so I can once again enjoy my days in a way most will never understand, or experience.

Carry on my friends…